Health and Fitness

‘The Five’ on rising crime, smash-and-grab thefts in Democrat-led cities

This is a rush transcript of “The Five” on December 14, 2021. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

JESSE WATERS, FOX NEWS HOST: Hello everybody. I’m Jesse Watters along with Dagen McDowell, Geraldo Rivera, Dana Perino and Greg Gutfeld. It’s 5:00 in New York City and this is THE FIVE.

COVID hysteria back in full force. Liberals are renewing their push to impose the forever pandemic on millions of weary Americans. New York and California join a growing a list of blue states with a statewide mask mandate for all public indoor spaces even if people are vaccinated.

The freak out over omicron not lining up with the facts so far. Doctors say that the variant not as severe. Republicans in red states are pushing back and telling people it’s time to stand up.


RON DESANTIS, GOVERNOR OF FLORIDA: You give these people an inch they will never let go. They’re going to take a mile. They are going to restrict. They’re going to mandate. They’re going to lock you down. There’s no reason to be restricting or mandating anybody throughout our country.

In 2022, if you’re in those states, you need to make your voice heard and you got to do a change of direction because I fear that they’re going to continue to do this until they suffer at the ballot box.


WATTERS: And the Democrats mandate madness doesn’t’ end there. Eric Swalwell and other House Democrats want a federal COVID vaccine requirement before you fly. And David Fr of “The Atlantic” with a truly despicable idea suggesting treating unvaccinated patients last in hospitals.

Dana, it seems like the politics have shifted on this mandate thing and it’s really moving against the Democrats.

DANA PERINO, FOX NEWS: Yes. Did they learn nothing about the elections from Virginia and then almost in New Jersey. It became very close and part of that was if you look the — even at the Democrats say, if they look into the research as to why they lost.

A lot of the parents were furious about the lock — the shutdowns of all the schools and the continued problems, but like the hypocrisy of you — all the mom-and-pop shops had to close but the big box stores like Home Depot, et cetera, they could be open.

So, then you had the other problem where you have fancy people who can go to a big party and mingle around without a mask but anybody who works there had to wear a mask. So there’s a huge disconnect in the inequality in of — this shaming is really big. We’ve never figured out a way to address natural immunity. We’ve never figured out a way to talk about the fact that we do have treatment.

So like for example the David Dr idea is quite as you said, despicable, but it’s also ridiculous because there are easy ways to treat it now with amazing advances in science. So speaking of science, the Democrats continue to get further and further away from it, which makes it harder to talk about the other issues that are important like climate change, which we’re going to talk about later in the show.

If you want to see Americans have a complete and total backlash, go ahead and have Eric Swalwell be the face of telling Americans that you are no longer allowed to travel. Let’s see how that goes.

WATTERS: I mean, flights are dangerous enough with everybody throwing haymaker’s at each other. Greg, David Fr, I’m sure you have some thoughts on him.



GUTFELD: No, I don’t. He’s a broken man. I mean, this is a man suffering from irrelevance and this is all he has left.


GUTFELD: So, pretty much he’s just lashing out. Everybody knows people who haven’t been vaccinated for legitimate reasons and there are therapeutics that can help and so on. So he’s just doing this because he’s a sad, sad loser.

Anyway, we were talking about this a couple years ago when this was — start — when it started out, that the public wants risk management. That’s all they’re asking for. They can accept risk in their lives. Politicians are into lawyer management, right? They are terrified of being sued. They’re also terrified of blood libel like if some people die, their opposition will say you have blood on your hands, you have blood on your hands, something that we were making fun of earlier.

But the desires of people, Americans, are becoming less important than their — than the politicians insurance premiums or the businesses insurance premiums. There really needs to be a grass roots kind of like tea party representation made up of all political stripes. You know, we are dealing — this is an issue where government now is incompatible with the people it represents.

And so you could be hyperbolic and say we need a divorce, we need a civil war, but what you really need is a hostage negotiator, right? We need somebody that can go to the leaders and talk — and explain to them what the people want so there can be a compromise because this is not going to – – this is not going to end well for the politicians.

I don’t know what that kind of person is, but our leaders are being held hostage by lawyers and insurance companies, also the fear of blood libel, and they in turn are holding American, the American public hostage. So there, that’s where you need the negotiation. Our leaders are no longer leading. They’re actually crouching. They’re trying to minimize themselves as a target, right? That’s what they’re doing.

They’re not standing up the way the governor of Florida is standing up and saying look, I’m ready to fight this. I’m ready to take this. Instead, they’re like our governor, the New York governor or our mayor. They sit there and they just want to make sure they don’t get sued or they don’t get attacked. They are true and utter cowards because adults understand the nature of risk. They do. That’s what makes you an adult.

WATTERS: So you’re saying we need a hostage negotiator like Denzel Washington.

GUTFELD: Exactly! “Man on Fire.”

WATTERS: To calm — “Inside Man” or —

GUTFELD: I don’t know anymore.

WATTERS: — one of those guys to go in and knock some heads together, Dagen.

DAGEN MCDOWELL, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: Not a hostage negotiator over here. No patience.


MCDOWELL: Really don’t care.

WATTERS: You would not be the person I’d send to D.C.

MCDOWELL: Yes, I really don’t care. But I think that that’s being too generous with these left-wing leaders. I think that they are power hungry control freaks who think that government knows best. Kathy Hochul clearly misread the city and the state because people are checked. I don’t know who they voted for. I don’t know what party they’re a member of, but people are on fire about this mask mandate.

You know, two vaccines, one booster came to work every single day even at the height of the pandemic. And yesterday, here and everywhere, it felt like March of 2020.


MCDOWELL: And so, people freely gave up their freedoms and civil liberties for the greater good to fight this, this pandemic, and now they realize that it’s almost impossible to claw back that self-determination and that self-control or that free will. And so, next time around, it’s going to be even harder.

JPMorgan had to implement only vaccinated people can come in the building because the employees were so angry about how having to wear masks and being vaccinated in their workplace. I just want to point one more thing out. There is — and Greg’s talked about this endlessly — COVID zero is a fallacy. It is never ever going to happen. And here’s why I know, because a large number of deer have gotten COVID in this country.

There have been different studies. One-third of deer were tested positive for COVID. There were like 80 percent of sample deer late last year, early this year had COVID. So basically the animal kingdom is going to be just spitting out new variants around the globe and so you’ll never ever get rid of it. Just treat it like what it is.

WATTERS: We’re testing deer for COVID-19?

MCDOWELL: Yes. That’s what —

GUTFELD: They’re calling it the Bambi variant.

MCDOWELL: Seriously, 80 percent.

GERALDO RIVERA, FOX NEWS HOST: I have so many deer on my property in Ohio. It’s amazing.

MCDOWELL: Lots of bats.

GUTFELD: Well, that’s a huge property, Geraldo.

WATTERS: That’s a huge — how big is that property, Geraldo?

RIVERA: It’s about this big.

WATTERS: It’s bigger every time.

RIVERA: So, was Johnny smoking dope when he gave you that COVID hysteria title? I mean it’s absolutely ridiculous. In Cleveland, Ohio, there are the same number of people in hospital and in ICU’s this December as they were last December. It’s back. You know, you mock omicron just the way you mocked delta and then all of a sudden it kicked everybody in the ass.

I absolutely deplore politicians like Governor DeSantis who treat medical problems with ideology. He lost 62,000 Floridians to this disease, almost 800,000 Americans dead —

GUTFELD: Blood on their hands, Geraldo.

RIVERA: You know, we — it is time that you recognize that there is a — there is a reality, a once in a century reality that we have not gotten over yet. We have to get ahead of. These political in-fights do not help anybody.

WATTERS: But Geraldo — Geraldo —

GUTFELD: What else could be better than New York?

WATTERS: — why is California doing worse with all the mandates and a lot of lockdowns (inaudible).

GUTFELD: Yes. And same with New York.

RIVERA: Who knows? The wind blows this —

WATTERS: Who knows? The wind blows. That’s your answer.

RIVERA: Something happened — we don’t know. You take the best shot you can —

GUTFELD: So what is doing great?

RIVERA: — to do the best you can to protect your citizens and stop making it a political issue.

WATTERS: Yes, but you also have to protect their liberties and their freedoms, Geraldo.

RIVERA: Liberty for what? To go sneeze on you?

WATTERS: No, to go make a living. To go send your kid to school.

RIVERA: I was so happy flying in today that people were very conscientious. I like — sometimes you need fear, you need a bit of fear so you have caution and prudence. Right now you need caution and prudence.

WATTERS: All right, well, listen. Geraldo, if we were afraid of everything we wouldn’t let kids go in a car —

RIVERA: This is not everything.

WATTERS: — because there is more likelihood of a kid dying in a car accident —

RIVERA: This is a once a lifetime.

WATTERS: than catching COVID and dying.

MCDOWELL: With anti-viral drugs that are coming out on the market. So virtually no one is going to die from this.

GUTFELD: But I question your stats, Geraldo, on Florida because —

RIVERA: 62,000 deaths. I just looked it up.

GUTFELD: — no, no. But what I’m —

RIVERA: 62,007.

GUTFELD: — what I’m saying is what we’ve seen now as the — because everybody — now do New York and now do California because what we’re seeing is Florida is doing better overall after taking some calculated risks. So, you’re doing the single variable thinking when you should be looking at all the variables. And then you get emotional about it.

RIVERA: Between Rand Paul and Ron DeSantis though —

GUTFELD: You like — you like to single people out.

RIVERA: I like to single them, but you make fun of them. I’m not making fun of them.

WATTERS: Well, you like Cuomo?

RIVERA: I’m just saying that they are dreaming.

WATTERS: You like Cuomo who killed all those people in the nursing homes? I’ll take DeSantis, you take Cuomo, all right. We got to go. Coming up, here’s what shopping now looks like thanks to Joe Biden’s crime waves.


PERINO: While shopping is starting to look a lot different this Christmas, a famous complex in Los Angeles resembling a war zone with barbed wire like fencing being put up to stop potential smash and grab thieves.

Now, while local officials blame the problem on no bail policies, the White House is still refusing to take a strong stance on that.


JEN PSAKI, WHITE HOUSE PRESS SECRETARY: I am not as I — as I wasn’t yesterday, going to give an assessment for every — in every motivation or reason for crime in different communities across the country. What I’ve noted what you see in data is that there has been an increase in crime since the start of the pandemic. I will let others assess what the reason for that increase in crime is. That is all I was conveying yesterday.


PERINO: And (inaudible) Philly District Attorney Larry Krasner now profusely sorry for downplaying the crime crisis there.


LARRY KRASNER, PHILADELPHIA DISTRICT ATTORNEY: I did not acknowledge the pain and the hurt that people feel in the city of Philadelphia. My words unintentionally hurt people. It was never what I wanted to do. It’s not the work that we do every day. It’s not the work we will do the rest of today.


PERINO: What happened to Uncle Larry?

WATTERS: It sounds like an apology I’ve given before.

RIVERA: Just stay on the air.

WATTERS: Jesse Watters is extremely sorry that my comments were misinterpreted and any hurt that I’ve caused — come on, Larry. And just so Psaki knows, the crime rate in Philly especially homicides have gone up since 2018 every single year. And I remember I think the coronavirus started in 2020. So that has nothing to do with the coronavirus.

But good thing Uncle Larry has the press because the “Philly Enquirer” came out today. You’re not going to believe what the headline was. Republicans pounced when D.A Larry Krasner said Philly doesn’t have a crisis of crime. They pounced. It’s about Republicans pouncing. So, I’m looking at the fences being put up and then I remember Joe Biden put up a fence outside his Delaware vacation home.

PERINO: But not the border.

WATTERS: I think Nancy put up a fence around the capitol. They put up a fence around the mansion here for de Blasio. We were told fences were racist and now fences are fine. It’s just like everything that we’ve seen, you know. It’s always like, oh, you know what, maybe the travel ban wasn’t racist, maybe defunding the police wasn’t such a great idea.

It’s like the definition of a conservative is watching other people make the mistake you warned them about.


WATTERS: This is where we are right now.

PERINO: That’s so true.

WATTERS: You have to fight crime. You can’t just accept crime as part of your life. Democrats don’t understand it. People are going to keep committing felonies. You just have to lock them up and make sure that they don’t keep doing that. Sadly, it’s going to take some really high profile person, probably won’t, probably — you could have the D.A., little Larry’s D.A.’s wife get her jewelry snatched from some guy. He just let out on low bail.

And the democrats still wouldn’t do anything differently until they lost an election. That’s the only thing on crime that’s going to change that.

PERINO: I really couldn’t stand making accommodations for the thieves by putting up the fence.

GUTFELD: Yes, but I, I mean, just what Jesse, you know, the wife of a music legend —


GUTFELD: — was murdered in L.A. Do you think that made any liberal change their mind?

WATTERS: I didn’t see it.

GUTFELD: No, because it didn’t happen to their family.


GUTFELD: Yes, barbed wire is what happens when you accept broken windows, right? And then barbed wire is what happened when you have fewer police cars out there. No police foot traffic. No appearance of law enforcement which is what we were told was going to be a really good thing.

So, and you see this, I mean, you see this in every bad area of town where they have the junkyards you got barbed wire and you got pit bulls because that’s the only disincentive left when the cops are no longer there. I mean, this is basically — if you want to take — if the cities and the defunders want sanctuary cities for criminals we should let them have it.

Just go, let’s say, okay, and then everybody just move out let them have their road warrior, you know, dystopian universe and just let it go rather than taking these little baby steps to, what’s his face, Krasner. He’s downplaying — you know, the apology is way too late because there are a lot of people dead in Philly because of the downplaying that enabled the crime wave.

You have de Blasio, you have left-wing D.A.’s who — and obviously Don Lemon and Chris Cuomo on CNN denying the crime wave, actually mocking us, mocking us on television saying it didn’t exist. Meanwhile, who were dying? Minorities. Most of these victims are minorities. They’re not whites.

So that, you know, so it’s like you wonder if these D.A.’s or if these people at CNN are actually racist because it’s like how they defend abortion, you know, but abortion takes more black unborn lives as a percentage than white and they couldn’t be happier. They couldn’t be happier.

So maybe underneath this all is this — their way, the left-wing way of cleaning society from a racial perspective, right? They’re disgusting.

MCDOWELL: Yes. I’m making that — that’s disgusting.


MCDOWELL: They are. And that’s who gets hurt. That’s who elected Eric Adams as the mayor —

PERINO: That’s true.

MCDOWELL: — who got him the nomination in —

PERINO: Yes. When you look at the map.

MCDOWELL: — in the spring. It was the Bronx —


MCDOWELL: — Queens —


MCDOWELL: — Brooklyn, people of Colorado.

PERINO: — Upper East Side.

MCDOWELL: It was Latinos and black individuals and families, not the snots with the (inaudible) living in the doorman building in Manhattan. So if Eric Adams — I might have said this yesterday, I don’t know. I’ve got the —

PERINO: It’s all right.

MCDOWELL: — maybe the fruit fly. If Eric Adams starts going out and just locking people up, what’s the governor going to say about it? No? What’s the, you know, what’s — if they just start going out and just start arresting people, you steal anything, we’re taking you, and just start — that definitely will begin sending a message because I think that it’s not just the tolerance for egregious COVID restrictions that has topped out, but also the tolerance for skyrocketing crime.

New York City, I read this in “The New York Times” today, regained fewer than six out of 10 jobs during — lost during the pandemic. The nation as a whole has regained more than nine out of 10. I say that’s because of crime. People will not get on subways and commute to work. The very people who need protection. And this is the making of that suck hole, that financial suck hole that cities cannot get out of once your tax base leaves, and once you have really high unemployment.

PERINO: Michael Nutter is a former mayor of Philadelphia. He’s one of the people that came out is so strongly against what Krasner had said and maybe that’s what really made the difference and made Krasner finally apologize.

RIVERA: Well, with Krasner, it is the most homicides, well over 500 in Philadelphia history, in the history of the city of brotherly love. It is extraordinary how, you know, and all, virtually all African-American men. I mean, it’s horrifying. When Krasner made one of his pronouncements, it was when they had — they found four people in southwest Philly shot execution style in one house.

I want to say two quick things. Number one is, with the retail thefts, the gang thefts, we need massive RICO investigations. All these kids coordinated, they say, by social media. So they’ve arrested a handful. You take the handful and you find their social media, you trace the social media till you can bust one — get one network. Do one high-profile prosecution at the federal level of these gang bangers. Send a message, unmistakably, that if you conspire then we will use RICO against you.

It just escalates the governmental response. I think also that we need a non-lethal way of preventing these mass retail thefts. And the idea I had was and you can mock me as you often do, but I believe that you know how they — when you rob a bank —

GUTFELD: Blow something.

RIVERA: — you put the cash in the bag. When you open the bag, it blows up in your face and it’s like neon, it’s pink, it’s green. You can’t get it off. It’s all over the money. It’s all over your head.

GUTFELD: You can’t sell it — you can’t sell the goods.

RIVERA: You can’t sell it. And do that. You can’t sell the Gucci bag anymore.

WATTERS: Not a bad idea.

GUTFELD: I’d say stink bombs so everything smells like crap.

RIVERA: But something like — why not, you know, a button where you could press and they spray stuff.


MCDOWELL: How about you give me the mask mandates to the people wearing masks you know are criminals.

GUTFELD: That’s a good point.

PERINO: All right. Up next, Democrats exploiting the tornado tragedy to push a climate change agenda.


MCDOWELL: Recovery efforts still underway in six states after a string of deadly tornadoes ripped through the heartland, left a trail of massive devastation. In Kentucky, at least 74 people are confirmed dead, but liberals are hell-bent on using this strategy to push their climate change agenda.


JOE BIDEN, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA: All that I know is that the intensity of the weather across the board has some impact as a consequence of the warming of the planet and the climate change.

DEANNE CRISWELL, FEMA ADMINISTRATOR: This is going to be our new normal.

MICHAEL MANN, CLIMATOLOGIST: You need to pass Build Back Better because that bill has climate provisions that will address this problem at its, you know, at its core, which is the warming of the planet.


MCDOWELL: No scientific studies have yet shown any direct link between climate change and tornadoes. And look at this graph that shows how global weather related deaths have actually fallen dramatically over decades. Greg, that’s Bjorn Lundberg, right?

GUTFELD: Yes, yes, from a great piece in the — it’s actually government data, but Bjorn Lundberg had published a great piece in “The Wall Street Journal” that shows that we are far safer from climate disasters. And this is when there’s more stuff to damage, right, than decades ago. As the population grows, you have a rise in all kinds of structures that are in the paths of floods and hurricanes and tornadoes.

But the trend of weather related damage in the last 30 years has gone from a 0.26 GDP, global GDP to 0.18. So it’s actually going down. But this happens all the time whenever there’s a tragedy like this.

You have people who don’t know anything about climate who say these things and then we have to go and we got to look for the data and then we have to come on the show, we have to do a really long segment about climate because we feel compelled to, like, because you have to spend half the time calling these idiots out.

Like Michael Mann saying that there’s been more deaths from climate disasters than COVID death. There are 21,500 climate related deaths, right, in one year compared to something like — it’s almost 18 million right now at this point, globally.

MCDOWELL: Yes, the excess deaths.

GUTFELD: Yes. So, that’s an 840 times difference. And Michael Mann is lying, bald-faced lying on TV saying that that’s not the case. So, this is something that we have to do every time — we had to do the legwork every time to combat these fallacies when in fact they would — if only they did this about crime, whether you could actually see the direct links between you know no cash bail, right, and the revolving door and you have the — but they won’t do that cause and effect. But they fabricate a cause and effect because there’s no solution to it which maintains their power.

MCDOWELL: And Dana, the pouncing on this before they even there how many 100 people still missing roughly before the dead are even found. The pouncing on this is just so —

PERINO: Well, you might remember, you know, the surf — remember when the Surfside condo collapsed?


PERINO: Secretary Granholm at the Department of Energy, the first thing she said is she blamed it on climate change. And that wasn’t what it was, right? So, they just immediately jump on it. And then, immediately they don’t take scientific data or evidence to link something to their policies. They just automatically say that OK the tornado strengthens our case for the Build Back Better because there’s climate change positions in there.

Inflation strengthens their case for Build Back Better. Everything — the Jets losing every Sunday is a justification for a Build Back Better.

MCDOWELL: Yes. More money, more control. That’s all they want, Jesse, regardless —


MCDOWELL: Like, half a trillion dollars is somehow giving it to Michael Mann who doesn’t even know how many deaths there are from COVID. That’s who they — that’s who would make decisions with the money essentially.

WATTERS: Well, but that’s the game they play. So, the government goes out and they say, we got $4 million to study the link between tornado ferocity and capitalism and some 50,000 a year researcher at a state school and says I’ll take $4 million. Hey, I’ll do that study. I’ll give you what you want. So, he does the study and then the government holds up the study and says science, see, let me raise your taxes now.

We have had tornadoes forever even before Geraldo, all right. They’ve been —

RIVERA: That’s old.

WATTERS: They’re very old, all right. Do you think the Native Americans were studying tornado velocity? Do you think the settlers in Tennessee were studying tornado?

GUTFELD: The weirdest arguments.

RIVERA: We’re going to go through all of history now.

WATTERS: Think about it.

RIVERA: Do you think the caveman?

WATTERS: In 1973, that was the first time we came up with a system to study tornado velocity. You know how we did it? All we do, we calculate the speed of the wind versus how much devastation there is on the ground. But it depends on the path of the tornado. Whatever’s on the ground is going to be devastating.

And whenever you build something, it’s going to be sturdier as civilization advances as Bjorn Gutfeld mentioned.

GUTFELD: Thank you.

WATTERS: So, they come up with this idea, oh, the world’s been around for fifth — five billion years. So, we’re just going to take the last 50 years and say, you know what, it’s our fault, it’s capitalism’s fault, so we’re just going to give all your taxpayer dollars to green donors, and then the green donors are going to re-engineer the entire world economy in a way that doesn’t use fossil fuels.

That is so stupid. It’s like a pagan ritual. Do you remember, oh the wind gods are angry, we have to sacrifice a virgin so the wind gods aren’t angry at us. That’s how much sense this makes.

RIVERA: Rob Marciano of ABC, my favorite non-Janice Dean Fox weather person said there are no studies linking the severity of tornadoes to climate change. And to his credit, the President of the United States Joe Biden said, we can’t say with absolute certainty that tornado was because of climate change. As a matter of fact some of it has to do with El Nino. So, there’s a little reason from the White House. We have to acknowledge it.


PERINO: That poor little boy, El Nino.

GUTFELD: Yes. He was such a sweet kid, yes.

MCDOWELL: So, we get — we get a little sliver or soups on or teaspoon of empathy from the commander —

GUTFELD: Yes. No, we were just grateful he said — he conditioned a phrase.


GUTFELD: We’ll take anything at this point.

MCDOWELL: Straight ahead, Kamala’s rehab tour hitting a snag. The Vice President won’t be happy about what just happened.


RIVERA: Wasn’t she great on Saturday Night Live? No?

GUTFELD: I didn’t watch it.

RIVERA: Kamal Harris just can’t catch — not Kamala Harris on Saturday Night Live. But she can’t, the Vice President, just can’t catch a break in her attempt for a political comeback after a series of brutal stories that her office was a terrible place to work. Yet, examples of her incompetence keep breaking example. The White House being forced to defend Harris’ role as the so-called border czar after Guatemala’s president claimed last week that he had had no contact with the Vice President since last June when she made that awkward visit to the Guatemalan capital.


PETER DOOCY, FOX NEWS CHANNEL WHITE HOUSE CORRESPONDENT: Why is it that she has not spoken to the President of Guatemala since June? That’s six months.

JEN PSAKI, WHITE HOUSE PRESS SECRETARY: Well, I know that — I did see this kind of strange report from the President of Guatemala saying that he’s had no contact with the White House which is inaccurate.

DOOCY: He said Vice President Harris he has not spoken to her. And if she’s in charge, why is that?


RIVERA: If it’s not her fault, whose fault is it, Dagen?

MCDOWELL: it is her fault. Of course, it’s her fault. It’s her job. She accepted it. Now, she’s trying to charge an electric car. That was a disaster. She’s like one of the most inauthentic people in Washington and that’s saying something.

I think that the — I want to talk — just quickly — mentioned that her staffers leaving. I think for me that was the biggest tell. Because you’re willing to be miserable working for somebody if you think that the road leads to the top job. But they did a risk-reward calculation and they cut bait because they saw that she was never going to go anywhere and they weren’t willing to put up with, well, garbage working in her office. That’s my opinion.

And I think that she — that she’s trying to distract by charging the electric car but it shows the idiocy of Washington because she proposed getting rid of all gasoline-powered cars by 2035 a few years ago and she clearly doesn’t really know how to charge electric one.

RIVERA: But Joe Biden is the boss. Joe Biden is unpopular. It’s not Kamala’s fault isn’t it?

WATTERS: Well, she hasn’t helped herself, Geraldo.

RIVERA: She has not.

WATTERS: If you’re going to go down and say you’re going to fix root causes and then ghost the guy for six months — come on. I mean they did the same thing with the crime thing. Remember they’re like, oh yes, we’re in touch. We’re sending all this federal help to these crime-ridden cities. And the sheriffs were like, we haven’t heard anything from you guys.

And then she scrambles to get something out and say, oh, actually, you know what, we got a bunch of companies together. We’re sending down millions of dollars to Central America. She’s bragging about how she’s bribing Latin American countries. You think these countries are just going to not take all this money, keep it, and keep sending the caravan?

RIVERA: I think that’s what happened to her plan, the reality of Central and South America.

WATTERS: Right. It’s like every day it seems like it’s her first day on the job. It’s so bad, Geraldo Politico is writing —

RIVERA: How bad is it, Jesse.

WATTERS: — advice columns.


WATTERS: It’s an advice column. How Kamala is awesome. Nothing is her fault. But here’s what she can do to get herself out of this rut. And then they interview six of the most highest-paid political consultants to give her free advice. I mean, I don’t remember this happening with Trump. You know, how Russia’s investigation is not Trump’s fault. What he can do to beat Mueller and win re-election? Like, this is crazy.

RIVERA: But, you know, Greg, it is a tough job being second banana.

GUTFELD: Oh, that’s true. But whose fault is that? It’s the Democratic Party because there’s so many examples of failures caused by just one variable decision making. Look at all of the — look at all of her — all of who she is, OK. She has a lack of charisma. She has a lack of depth. She has a lack of seriousness. Her primary showing was terrible. Her role of a prosecutor was questionable.

So, those are five variables. And if you were looking at them, you would have said, hell no as a VP choice. However, none of those variables mattered. They looked at one, and that was identity. And that was the one variable she could pass and it was the only variable that mattered.

They needed to pair that identity with an old white male on his last legs. It’s like pairing the right wine with a rubbery plate of bad chicken. So, the problem is, whenever you make a decision —

WATTERS: We go into that banquet.

GUTFELD: Yes, exactly. This is a bad banquet. This is — any decision based on one variable will fail a hundred percent of the time. They had all these variables in front of them that they could have seen that she was a disaster, but they chose one. She was a woman of color.


WATTERS: Did you (INAUDIBLE) book on variables?

GUTFELD: No, I’ve learned that all from Scott Adams.


RIVERA: Am I an old Brown man on his last legs?


RIVERA: But you know, Dana, I’ve always said it’s — her problem is lethargy and a lack of verb.

PERINO: Well, here’s the thing. So, when Jen Saki was asked that question, she — if she had been given permission by the president and the chief of staff, she could have said, it’s a great question. I suggest you call the Vice President’s office and ask them.

WATTERS: That’s cold.

PERINO: And then — but that will force them to do it because the whole — when she went to Guatemala in the first place, that was the photo op for the root causes to her. Then, she doesn’t do anything else. But now, they’re trying to fix her problem with photo ops and crowdsourcing political advice when it just — it’s going to take some time. Get some stuff done.

RIVERA: Is it possible?


RIVERA: OK then.

GUTFELD: Well, you know what? What Dana says is obvious. It’s obvious. She wrote And The Good Is.

RIVERA: Miss Optimism.

PERINO: And Everything Will Be Okay.

GUTFELD: And Everything Will Be Okay. And now, it’s like no, it’s not.

RIVERA: Ahead, the Squad wants you to foot the bill for student debt.


GUTFELD: The Squad lashing out at President Biden. After he announced the White House — White House has no plans to extend the current pause on federal student loan repayments.


REP. ALEXANDRIA OCASIO-CORTEZ (D-NY): I have over 17,000 in student loan debt. We have a moral obligation, an economic obligation, a political obligation to cancel student loan debt.

REP. RASHIDA TLAIB (D-MI): I worked full-time Monday through Friday and took weekend classes to get my law degree, and still close to $200,000 in debt.


GUTFELD: You know what? Screw you. No one has to pay your damn debt. That’s on you. It is not a moral obligation on anybody for the decisions that you make. Hell, why don’t we do this? You know what’s better? Forget the student loan — I just saw that. I’m sorry. Why not do car loan debt, Dagen, because you know what, that’s more egalitarian?

They brought — you know AOC probably doesn’t have a car in New York, right? She doesn’t need one or she has a driver. I bet that driver has car loan debt. Why don’t we do car loan debt? That’s probably about 17 grand too. That’s more for the working class than for these over-educated, over- caffeinated idiots.

PERINO: AOC drives a Tesla.

GUTFELD: Oh, there you go.

PERINO: There — and that — so, yes, exactly.

GUTFELD: Oh, poor thing.

PERINO: And she could pay that on a day.

MCDOWELL: I want my mortgage forgiven and also I want them to cut my father a check for helping pay for my college because that’s where we’re going. And by the way, AOC is a testament of why you shouldn’t pay a lot of money for an education. She got a degree in economics and international studies from international relations from Boston University. It cost about 300,000 right now full if you pay everything to get a degree there.

She got out a degree in economics, didn’t know how the damn unemployment rate was calculated. So, that’s what you get for your three grand that you pay at BU.

GUTFELD: You know what, Dana? You know what? I would be for canceling the debt if the colleges paid for it or if the banks did. But you put that on taxpayers. I will actually volunteer for the war — for the war. I will join the Army because you aren’t making me pay for your stupid — anyway.

PERINO: So, like — so AOC went to a school. It’s $58,000 a year.


PERINO: She drives a Tesla. Look at her clothes. And she’s complaining about the student loan debt.

GUTFELD: It’s you’re moral obligation.

PERINO: Yes. Now, I could almost say a bad word about that.

GUTFELD: Please do. I’m close.

PERINO: But mark the tape.

RIVERA: You couldn’t say a bit.

PERINO: Mark the tape.


PERINO: Biden will cave. He cannot afford a Squad uprising and he’ll cave just like he did on the rental moratorium and then hope — and you know, cross his fingers that the courts will deny him that ability.

GUTFELD: Yes. The people that were forgiving are not poor.

WATTERS: Please don’t join the Army.

GUTFELD: I know. I’m too old. I’m too old.

WATTERS: For the sake of yourself and for the country.

GUTFELD: And for the Army too.

WATTERS: And for everybody you love.

GUTFELD: The Army would be destroyed if I join.

RIVERA: I’ll be the war correspondent covering you.

WATTERS: Have you ever noticed every time we do a Squad segment, it’s the Squad demands this, the squad demands that. This is like the hostage negotiation.


WATTERS: It’s really exhausting. Notice how AOC though, she structures her argument this way. I have debt so we have to fix my debt problem. Oh, I’m convinced. Where do I cut the check AOC? I don’t know. I was just about to pay some charity to help kids with cancer but —

PERINO: Right.

WATTERS: You know, Cortez, you’re really a sad sack.


WATTERS: Come on.

GUTFELD: A lot of these people, Geraldo, they’re like upper-middle class, women, men —

RIVERA: True. True. But I think you’re on something when you said — when you mentioned the colleges and what a racket that is on how they boosted their tuitions.

GUTFELD: Yes, I agree.

RIVERA: I think that student loans should be grossly reduced in the terms of the maximum level. When you get $300,000, you’re not spending it on your book or your tuition. You’re spending it on life, you know. And then all of a sudden, life comes back to bite you in the ass. That’s twice I’ve said ass today.

PERINO: Three times actually.

RIVERA: Three times. I apologize. So, you restrict the amount that can be borrowed and you restrict the interest rate. You minimize this whole sector because right now to pay 50,000 in college debt for each person that owes college debt in this country is $1 trillion. Biden may be pressured by the Squad but he’s not a fool.

MCDOWELL: Yes, you get out and she says every — the unemployment rate is low because everybody has two jobs.

GUTFELD: That’s a good impression.

RIVERA: Really?

GUTFELD: All right, “ONE MORE THING” is up next.

MCDOWELL: Just wrong. That’s not how the unemployment rate is calculated.


WATTERS: It’s time now for “ONE MORE THING.” The Jesse Watters apology tour —

GUTFELD: Continues.

WATTERS: — still continues. This tour has gone on much longer than anybody expected.

GUTFELD: Not me.

WATTERS: Thank you, Greg. I’d like to issue another apology to the teachers who I slandered yesterday with some casual comments about how they’re all lazy because they have the summers off and don’t need extra free time because they’re not really burned out because they get spring break, winter break, and all the federal holidays.

I think this really has to do with my deep-seated issues involving my parents who are both teachers so I’m just working out those issues, no offense. It has nothing to do with the fact that you guys embezzled a lot of money of COVID funds or anything like that.

GUTFELD: Not at all.

WATTERS: But I am sorry to the teachers whom I offended. Is it who or whom? You guys decide. Also, I would like to retract an apology I made to cats. The cats did not accept my apology, thus it has been retracted. Thus, therefore let the teachers again —

RIVERA: Cats as in felines?

WATTERS: Yes, as in felines, Geraldo.

PERINO: That’s a lot of —

RIVERA: Did they complain?

WATTERS: This apology tour issues and retracts. We go both ways.


RIVERA: I heard that about you.

WATTERS: Thank you, Greg.

PERINO: Very fluid. Very fluid.


PERINO: OK. So, Time Magazine announced its person of the year, but more important, the puppy of the year. There he is. That’s Percy. There he is. A Five Fan Photoshop poking me up there. But I’ve also been — I’ve been — I want to show you this video. So, we have this acrylic table and he’s like trying to figure it out how do how does he get to that fish can. He figure it out. Yes, he’s a very smart dog. There he is.

WATTERS: Brilliant.

PERINO: It looks better on the phone than it does on TV.

MCDOWELL: There for a second, it didn’t look like a fish, Dana.

PERINO: Oh, gosh.

GUTFELD: Oh, geez.

PERINO: Oh gosh.

GUTFELD: That’s what they say.


GUTFELD: Oh, it’s my turn. You know, tonight, Jesse is on my show along with Walter Kern, Kat, and Tyrus. It’s going to be a great show. And so is this going to — is going to be great. Greg’s nothing surprises you in Bonner Spring news. A camel strolling down a highway past the car and listen to what the guy has to say. He got loose from a manger setup, I guess, right?


UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Nothing surprises me in Bonner Springs.


GUTFELD: Yes. Let’s hear that again shall we?

RIVERA: I got the idea.

WATTERS: I mean —


UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Nothing surprises me in Bonner Springs.


WATTERS: Camels are escaping —


WATTERS: Nativity scenes. Trees are being burned up.

GUTFELD: It was — it was a live nativity scene. Nothing surprises you in Bonner Springs.

WATTERS: No, he didn’t like the working conditions. He just walked right off the set. Geraldo.

RIVERA: All right, tonight’s Geraldo news with Geraldo features my granddog. My daughter, Isabella, came visiting us in Cleveland, Ohio. And I was trying to do a workout, trying to do my sit-ups when I was interrupted by the cutest little — well, that’s the end of the shot. You missed the whole shot.

PERINO: Wow. Why are you wearing a t-shirt?

WATTERS: There’s so many clothes.

GUTFELD: Yes. At least those socks are up. He was — this was kind of gruesome and strange. Where’s your life alert, Geraldo?

WATTERS: I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.

RIVERA: He’s the cutest dog, Pippin, my granddog.

PERINO: Cute name.

WATTERS: Dagen, take us home.

MCDOWELL: Really quickly. A U.K. dad James Dickinson had drawings from his niece, his nephew, and his son tattooed on his leg. That’s Ariel, the incredible hulk, and Lord Voldemort.

PERINO: That’s a great idea for Pete Hegseth.

MCDOWELL: I love it.

RIVERA: Those are real tattoos?

WATTERS: Oh yes. Right next to the Declaration of Independence.

All right, that’s it for us. “SPECIAL REPORT” is up next with Bret Baier.

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